Being different or is it so different???

I have almost lived my entire maiden life at my maternal grandparent place which is not considered the proper thing to do in Indian society.I have found it to be a topic of discussion by some group of people.Over the years they have used it to rub my nose into it.I confess i have let it bother me for few of these times and today I felt the need to analyze it.This being brought by an incident.It so happened .I met one of my relatives after 10-15 years gap.In mood to talk atleast about something ,I remarked about not meeting them for these many year.To my utter confusion the answer was somewhat so out of context atleast that is what I thought at that time.It was something along the line "if you live at your -in laws this is what happens.I did not understand it then but the lines came back to me after few hours and enlightment dawned.I have never understood what the fuss is about till now.Each of us have different kind of live-in relationship and I happen to be living with an ever loving family maybe just not the expected set.Why have this always been contentious,brought up by foes whenever a need arose to attack our family,brought up by family when they need to score a point.As if its a shame which is seared forever."Oh you know this is actually not done but they are different"Not even understanding it completely,I felt it was ridiculous to form a sentence on it and now living so far away from India ,adapting to a diffrent culture, I find it ludicrous that someone still thinks about it and still remarks on it.I wonder if I meet them next time, would I be able to say these words "Grow up darling!! these things are petty matters ,much suitable for an illiterate mind which I hope you are not till now". I have moved too far in this walk of fame to let it affect me .Ghosts have been laid to rest long back ago.But really can I expect some intelligent topics of discussion from our female population or is it too much to ask for????or I will always be surprised like when I heard an educated woman bragging about bearing sons .In this span shouldn't some evolution or revolution be effected.